How to Manage Parenting and PMS
Have you ever wondered why some days it’s so much harder to parent than others?
Have you ever found yourself snapping at your children like you’re having a weird out of body experience?
Last week I posted on my Instagram that I was struggling with my kiddo.
I couldn’t work out if she was in a bad mood that day or if it was my PMS looming.
After a trip to the supermarket where everyone seemed to be in my way and was extremely annoying, I figured it might be me…haha
I’ve been much more aware of my cycle over the last few years thanks to the help of period coach Claire Baker.
What I’m sad I never heard in my parenting journey was how PMS can really affect you.
On that day last week, I felt ashamed and strange that I kept lashing out, both externally and internally, so I wanted to do some more research and share three tips with you ladies on how to manage parenting and PMS.
Track your thoughts
If you’re not tracking your cycle, I’d encourage you to make a start on this.
I use the app Clue, but any tool / reminder system can work.
What I want you to focus on is when you may be having pre menstrual symptoms. Due to oestrogen and progesterone dropping dramatically before your period, there is a reason for any physical and emotional symptoms you might personally experience.
I’ve decided to note down in my phone how I feel on these intense days and what I’m thinking.
Then I plan to refer back the following month when I’m struggling to hopefully remind myself that it will pass and that these thoughts are normal for this part of my cycle.
Last month, I noted that I:
Yelled as a parent
Wanted to give up on launching a new business idea
Found life incredibly boring
Had really sore calves
The good news is, a couple of days later I’d shifted away from these thoughts and symptoms and now I can see what comes up for me next month.
Share your symptoms
If your kids are old enough, I’d recommend sharing with them when you’re feeling premenstrual.
For so long these things have been kept hidden for no good reason, so if you can share and educate, please do.
If you’re dealing with younger kids, I would 100% recommend reaching out to friends to see if they can relate and/or be a helpful voice of reason during PMS.
After posting on Instagram, I had so many useful, amazing conversations with women in my life about how PMS affects their parenting.
I didn’t feel alone anymore and was able to share the ugly of my day with someone other than my 2 year old.
Release tension
I know it can be challenging to find the time and space to relax when you have children to look after (or a career, housework, the list goes on...).
Given the chance, I would have taken a bath and crawled into bed that day and watched Netflix, but that wasn’t on the cards.
Instead, take little pockets of time to take care of yourselves, even with the kids involved.
Going for a walk outside made a huge difference for me, as did having a quiet cup of tea while my daughter watched TV.
And the biggest thing I struggled with that day was the impatience I was feeling.
If you are physically feeling frustrated, I read a helpful tip about pushing up against a wall to release it.
I haven’t tried that yet, but know it’s a good back up plan to release frustration if I need to.
The next time your parenting feels out of control, check in with where you’re at on your cycle.
You might be surprised to see your hormonal changes lining up with a tough period at home and my three tips can help you zoom out from the immediacy of the situation and have more compassion for yourself and your children.
It is possible to parent with PMS without anger or guilt and you’ll be more self aware about what you most need when a challenging time comes around again.
If you’re a mum juggling a lot (plus PMS!), I’d encourage you to grab my free life balance calculator. It will help you work out where you’re most struggling, so you can catch it ahead of next month!