How To Feel Like You Have Plenty Of Time
After I wrote a post about hypnobirthing and the way many of us are set up to view childbirth and the newborn days, I got to thinking about the perception of free time once you actually become a parent.
I can’t even count how many times people said to me, “You think you’re busy now — well, wait until the baby comes.”
This felt like a pretty negative, fear-inducing statement to make to a pregnant woman, but I’m sure they were coming from the same place of indoctrination.
Once I had my daughter, I certainly understood what those well-meaning people meant. Much of my day was spent feeding her, changing nappies and trying to convince her to sleep. But I can also say I spent more time reading books and playing games on my phone (hello Cooking Craze!) than I probably ever had in my life. I began to wonder if I had more free time than I thought.
As a dedicated student of Brooke Castillo, I have heard her talk about our perception of time again and again.
She reminds us that the way we spend our time is 100% our choice and if we think “I never have any time”, that will become our eventual result.
I definitely went through periods of thinking that — especially once I returned to work 3 days a week. I would find myself rushing around in the morning before work, trying to simultaneously make my daughter’s breakfast, unload the dishwasher and put my makeup on — obviously impossible.
This anxious rushing began to leak into other parts of my week and I truly started to believe I was too busy and didn’t have enough time.
Since I also felt guilt about asking for breaks, I would find myself offering to hang out the laundry or excusing myself to go to the bathroom, just so I could have a breather. And no, I didn’t need to go to the bathroom, I just wanted a break!
A few weeks after I returned to work, I went back to some exercises that Brooke offers in Self Coaching Scholars and things began to shift.
In the mornings I adopted the new thoughts, “I have plenty of time” and “I will do one thing at a time.”
Thinking this repeatedly as I went about my morning worked wonders. This was illustrated when my partner asked if I had gotten up earlier that day, as I seemed so relaxed.
Nope, I had gotten up at the exact same time.
I also finally asked for consistent breaks. One we agreed to as a family was Saturday afternoons. Once my daughter went down for her afte
The first few weeks I had a massage, got my nails done and took myself on long walks.
I also started following the Monday Hour One program in Scholars religiously. Every week, I sit down and plan out my week, including free time first.
This includes getting up an hour before my daughter, planning what I might like to do while she naps, and thinking of how I can create space and relaxation for myself after she goes to bed at night.
Lo and behold, now when Saturday afternoons roll around, I don’t even really feel like I need a break (but of course, I take it).
Now that I plan my days and have changed my mindset, the thought “I have plenty of time” has come true. The best part is, I have exactly the same number of hours in the day as I did when I was anxious and overwhelmed.
Yes, I have asked for consistent breaks, which is definitely important, but I truly believe it was the new thoughts that changed everything for me.
I hope this helps you start to reflect on the thoughts you might be repeating to yourself. I am living proof that you can feel like you have plenty of time.
If you need help planning that time, make sure you download my free Daily Planner.